Wondering
by BenjiGirl4Ever
Summary: They're best friends,but then again,they feel like being more than friends.....
1. Benji

"BILLY!"  
  
"Oh shit....."Benji said,hearing Talon's voice.  
  
"BILLY MARTIN,WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?!?"Talon yelled,getting on the bus.  
  
Nikole and Amanda looked at eachother and smiled.  
  
"Emergency call 911,she's pissed off at everyone"They giggled.  
  
Benji and Joel laughed.The door burst open and Talon's hazel eyes searched the room. Eveyone smiled.  
  
"Where's Billy"She said.  
  
"Billy who?"Benji smiled.  
  
"Billy The Kid!"She said sarcastically "Billy Martin you idiots"  
  
"You're calling your older sisters idiots?"Amanda said,standing up.  
  
Talon immidiatly regretted calling them idiots,"No,I was calling those 2 idiots"  
  
Nikole stood up beside her sister,"You're calling my best friends idiots?"  
  
"Okay,this is going no where,we don't know where Billy is,Talon"Joel said.  
  
"That's all you had to freakin say"Talon said,turning on her heels.  
  
Both sets of Twins fell over laughing once the door had fully closed.Talon was 2 years younger than Nikole and Amanda,who were 21.  
  
"C'mon,we better go catch her before she kicks Billy's ass from whatever he did"Amanda said.  
  
Nikole agreed.They got up and left the room.Benji watched Nikole walk away.The look of pure lust in his eyes.  
  
"Easy bro"Joel said.  
  
Benji looked at him.  
  
"Joel,I've been in love with that girl since the day they moved in next door"Benji responded.  
  
"I know,but just be careful,I'm not fully sure that she likes you back"Joel explained.  
  
He slowly got up,leaving Benji alone in the back.Benji watched Joel walk off,and sat messing with his lip rings,and thinking about what he brother had just said.  
  
*Flash Back*  
  
Benji and Nikole were left alone in the darkness of the backyard.Both of them still giggleing slightly about Joel falling into the pool.  
  
"That's was stupid"Benji said,between laughs.  
  
Nikole agreed.After a few moments they still stood oposite eachother.  
  
"Um..."Benji said,slowly.  
  
"Um...what?"Nikole smiled.  
  
"This" Benji whispered,leaning his head down.  
  
He slowly brushed his lips over hers.As they kissed,they both lost their balance and fell in the pool.They swam to the surface and choked up water and looked at eachother.  
  
"Can we do that again?"Benji asked.  
  
"Which part?"  
  
"This one" He said,kissing her again.  
  
*End Flash Back*  
  
"She wants me"Benji noded to himself.  
  
He got up and walked to the front of the bus.Joel was kissing his girlfriend,Laura.  
  
"Hey Benj"Laura said,pulling away from Joel.  
  
Joel pulled her back into a kiss.  
  
"Right..."Benji raised an eyebrow.  
  
Laura pulled away from Joel again.  
  
"Wheres he going?"  
  
"To look for Nikole probablly, He's 'in love with her' "Joel responded.  
  
"Ohhh"Laura noded,as Billy ran on the bus and hid in his bunk.  
  
Talon came running after him.  
  
"Bunk" Joel and Laura both pointed.  
  
"ahhhh!!!!"They heard Billy yelled seconds later.  
  
They both laughed as Amanda came running after her sister,followed by Paul and Nikole.  
  
"Should we help?"Laura asked.  
  
"I think they have enough help"Joel laughed.  
  
Benji got on and looked at the group in the back,then to his brother.  
  
"Did Talon catch up with Billy?"He asked.  
  
Laura and Joel noded.  
  
"Oh"Benji said,sitting on the couch across from them.  
  
Later on Billy was recovering from Talon's PMS,Joel and Laura were kissing, Amanda and Paul were talking.Nikole sat in the back of the bus watching TV,Benji was in the front writing a song.When he realized what was surrounding him,he slowly got up and walked to the back.Nikole was watching Shallow Hal.  
  
"Hey"She smiled.  
  
"Hey"Benji smiled back.  
  
He plopped down beside her.  
  
"That's a good movie"  
  
She noded.  
  
"Um...can I talk to you?"He asked.  
  
"Sure"She responded.  
  
"I was thinking about that time when we were in high school.The time that Joel fell in the pool,and when we were in the backyard by ourselfs and we kissed and......."  
  
"And what?"Nikole smiled.  
  
"Did you feel anything?"Benji asked.  
  
Nikole smiled and noded.  
  
"Maybe...."Benji said,leaning down and pressing his lips firmly on hers. 


	2. Did that just happen?

Nikole,Amanda and Talon's nephew Caleb sat on Joel's lap.  
  
"Ya know,our parents spend 2 years teaching us to walk and talk"Billy said,playing with Caleb.  
  
"Yeah,then the next 18 yelling at us to shut up and sit down"Nikole laughed.  
  
"Nikole,can I talk to you?"Benji asked.  
  
"Um..sure"Nikole said,following Benji to the back.  
  
"oooooohhh"Laura smiled.  
  
The others agreed.Benji closed the door.There was silence for a few minutes.Benji sat down beside Nikole.  
  
"Um....."He struggled to find the words.  
  
Nikole smiled,and reached up,and pulled him down to kiss him.Benji pushed his tounge into her mouth.She smiled and kissed him deeper,and finally pulled Benji's lips softly with her teeth,and felt her tounge ring sucking into his mouth.Suddenly the door opened,and Billy walked in.  
  
"Oh shit!"Benji said,grabbing a pillow and covering his crotch.  
  
"Close the door!"Nikole whispered.  
  
Billy did as he was told.  
  
"What was going on back here"He laughed.  
  
"Nothing"Benji rolled his big brown eyes.  
  
"Then why do you have a pillow over...."  
  
"Shut up Billy!"Benji said,frustrated.  
  
"Sorry"Billy giggled.  
  
Nikole couldn't help but agree.They weren't trying to hide it,but they didn't want everyone to know either.  
  
"I'm just gonna go back in there"Billy said.  
  
"Whatever"Benji rolled his eyes.  
  
Billy closed the door and Benji turned to Nikole,smiling.She smiled back,then got up and walked out.  
  
"OH COME ON!"He yelled.  
  
"Bye,Benj"She laughed,closing the door.  
  
Benji rolled his eyes.  
  
~Later~  
  
Laura and Joel were alone in his and Benji's hotel room.They went from making out to....well.....not quite there but almost,when the door opened.Benji strolled in smiling.  
  
"Benji!"Joel yelled.  
  
Benji smiled even bigger,"My room to baby bro!"  
  
"Okay 1. WE'RE TWINS! and 2. It's my turn to be alone with my girlfriend!"Joel responded.  
  
"Just coming in here to get my cash,chill"Benji laughed.  
  
Laura rolled her eyes and waited for Benji to leave.He took his time getting his wallet.Finally he found it and walked out.  
  
"Where were we?"Joel smiled.  
  
Laura giggled and turned off the light.  
  
In the next room,Billy,Amanda,Talon,Paul,Benji and Nikole were getting ready to go eat. 


	3. Baby Benji?

A week later Nikole had locker herself in the bathroom of her and Laura's hotel room.  
  
"Nikole,are you okay?" Amanda asked,knocking on the door.  
  
Nikole looked up and then back to the floor.  
  
"C'mon opene the door!Please,I'm your sister!"Amanda said.  
  
Nikole sighed and let her sister in.  
  
"What's wrong?"Amanda asked,sitting beside her sister.  
  
"Manna,I'm late"She said.  
  
"No,we don't have to meet the guys until 2,we're....."  
  
"NO, I'M Late"Nikole sighed.  
  
Then it hit Amanda.  
  
"As in....."  
  
Nikole noded.  
  
"Benji?"  
  
Nikole noded again.  
  
"You think you are?"  
  
"I might be"  
  
"You want to buy a test?"  
  
"I wouldn't have the guts to"  
  
"I'll buy you one.I'm the one that go the guts!"Amanda smiled.  
  
~  
  
Laura,Amanda and Talon sat on the bed when Nikole walked out of the bathroom.She sat down beside them.  
  
"Well?"Laura asked.  
  
"We have to wait a few minutes"Nikole responded.  
  
"We can do that"Amanda noded,nervously.  
  
"Go look for me"Nikole said.  
  
"Um....."  
  
"Please"  
  
Amanda noded and walked into the bathroom.She slowly walked back out.  
  
"Well?"The girls asked.  
  
Amanda bit her lips.  
  
"Amanda!"  
  
"It blue"Amanda said,reluctantly.  
  
"Oh God"Nikole said,getting up and running into the bathroom.  
  
The girls heard her throw up.Suddenly the door opened and the boy walked in.  
  
"Where's Nikole?"Benji asked.  
  
Then he heard her in the bathroom and headed over.  
  
"NO!"Amanda said.  
  
"Amanda move"Benji said.  
  
"Benji,you don't want to go in there"Laura said.  
  
Benji simply picked up Amanda and moved her to the said,and walked into the bathroom.  
  
"Are you okay?"He asked.  
  
Nikole looked up.  
  
"Oh God"She said,again.  
  
Benji rubbed her back and she threw up.Then he noticed the test sitting on the sink.He picked it up and looked at her. She slowly stood up.Benji closed the door and looked at her.  
  
"Is this yours?"He asked.  
  
She sighed and slowly noded.  
  
"OMG" Benji whispered"It's positive"  
  
"I'm sorry"She whispered.  
  
"No baby"He responded,puting his around around her.  
  
She was crying into his shirt.He wouldn't let her see,but tears were falling down his face to.  
  
~  
  
Benji walked into his and Joel room.  
  
"And where have you been?It's 2:30 am" Joel said.  
  
"With Nikole"Benji said,falling back onto his bed.  
  
"Doing what?"Joel smiled,devilishly.  
  
"Joel,........Joel she's pregnant" 


	4. Baby Joel?

Benji sat in the front seat of the car,waiting for the girls to get to the car.  
  
"Could you go any slower?"He asked,once Laura,Nikole and Amanda were in the car.  
  
"Of course!"Laura laughed.  
  
Suddenly she didn't feel all that great.  
  
"You okay?"Amanda asked.  
  
"I"m fine,promise"Laura responded.  
  
"Ya sure,I don't want you throwing up in here"Benji said.  
  
"I"m fine,I promise!"Laura nodded.  
  
"Okay,if you're sure"Amanda said.  
  
Benji headed to the doctors office.Nikole was 3 months and she was going to get a check up.Amanda and Laura had,of course, accompanied her for support.Laura,for another reason other than that.They pulled up infront of Dr.Dar's office. Benji helped Nikole out of the car,even though she wasn't big yet. They walked into the office and signed in,then sat and waited for their name to be called.  
  
"Nikole Madden!"A nurse yelled.  
  
"Madden?"Nikole,Laura and Amanda all looked at Benji.  
  
Benji just smiled.Him,Nikole and Amanda got up and walked into the back room.Laura slowly got up and walked to the counter.  
  
"Yes Ma'am,Can I help you?"The receptionist asked.  
  
"I need a pregnancy test"She whispered.  
  
"Alright,let me get one of the nurses"The reception is nodded.  
  
Laura took a deep breath as a nurse walked over and walked her into a room,where she took the test.  
  
In Dr.Dar's office,Nikole lay on the table looking at the screen,at her and Benji's baby.  
  
"Everything appears to be nor......."Dr.Dar began but soon shut his mouth.  
  
A nurse was shaking her head 'no' in the doorway.  
  
"Dr.Dar,may I speak with you?"She said.  
  
"Yes,of course"He said,leaving the room.  
  
Benji and Nikole looked at eachother.  
  
"Somethings wrong with the baby?"Amanda asked.  
  
"No,no,I think she's fine,look at her"Benji noded towards the screen.  
  
"Her?"Nikole asked.  
  
"Or him"Benji bit his lip.  
  
"You want a girl don't you"Nikole smiled.  
  
"Maybe"Benji shrugged.  
  
"Wheres Laura?"Amanda noticed she was missing.  
  
"Prolly in the waiting room."Nikole responded.  
  
Laura sat on the bed waiting for the nurse to come back,  
  
"Good news Mrs.Madden,you're about a month along"The nurse said.  
  
"What?"Laura asked.  
  
"Yes,you're about a month pregnant"The nurse said.  
  
Laura passed out right then and there.  
  
Dr.Dar walked back into the room.Benji looked up at him.  
  
"What's wrong with my baby?"He asked.  
  
"Oh,The baby is fine,it just has an irregular heart be,do either one of you have that?"  
  
Nikole nodded,"I do"  
  
"Then the child must have inherited from you"Dr.Dar said.  
  
"Okay"  
  
"Other than that it's fine.You are free to go home"  
  
"Thank you"Benji smiled.  
  
Nikole got up and followed the others down the hall.They passed Lauras room and saw her lying on the floor. They ran in and kneeled beside her.  
  
"What happen to her?"Amanda asked.  
  
"I just told her she was pregnant"The nurse responed.  
  
"She's what?"Everyone stood up.  
  
"Pregnant"The nurse said.  
  
They got her to the car and fanned her with a backstage pass from one of the concerts.She slowly came to.  
  
"I just had the worse dream,I was pregnant"Laura said.  
  
"That wasn't a dream sweety"Amanda said.  
  
"OMG"Laura groaned.  
  
"Just imagine how Joel's gonna take it"Benji said.  
  
"JOEL?"Laura said,realizing she still had to tell Joel. 


	5. BabyMamaDrama

Joel sat in a chair in the hotel room writing lyrics down. Benji sat next to his brother.  
  
"Hey bro!"  
  
"Hey,how was the appointment?"Joel asked.  
  
"It was good,the baby's fine,other than an irregular heart beat.And seeing as I'm not the only guy that's gonna be a dad on the bus"Benji hinted to his brother.  
  
"What do you mean?"Joel said,still writing.  
  
"You know,there's gonna be another dad"Benji noded.  
  
"Still not sure what you're saying bro"  
  
"There are going to be 2 babies"  
  
"Oh! Twins,like you and me!"Joel said,looking up.  
  
Benji sighed, "NO!Think about what I'm saying stupid!"  
  
"2 babies,all that comes to mind is you and me"Joel shrugged.  
  
"Joel,look at me!"Benji said.  
  
Joel looked up,  
  
"I guess I'm AM the one that got the looks AND the brains!"Benji sighed.  
  
"We're identical stupid!"Joel laughed.  
  
"Joel,2 dads,2 babies!"Benji grabbed his face.  
  
"I heard that"Joel said."Billy's gonna be a dad?"  
  
"No"  
  
"Paul"  
  
"No"  
  
"You....wait,I already knew that.Me?"  
  
"Yes"  
  
"Oh okay" Joel noded,going back to his work.  
  
Benji sighed and rolled his eyes,and got up and walked out.Then it his Joel.  
  
"WAIT!WHAT?"He yelled.  
  
~  
  
Laura sat thinking of ways to tell Joel she was pregnant.  
  
"I'm sooo screwed!"Laura said.  
  
"Just tell him"Talon said.  
  
"I don't want him to leave though"Laura said.  
  
"He won't.He dosn't want to be like his dad.Neither dose Benji"Nikole said.  
  
"They hate their dad for what he did,why would he do the same thing"Amanda asked.  
  
"I dunno"Laura shrugged.  
  
"Just go!"Nikole said.  
  
Joel was laying on his bed face down.Benji looked down at him.  
  
"It's not that bad!"He said.  
  
"yeshishish"Joel said into his pillow.  
  
"Joel,get up!"Benji sighed.  
  
Joel remained face down.There was a knock at the door.  
  
"I got it"Benji sighed.  
  
It was Laura,he slowly slipped out and left Laura and Joel alone.  
  
"Joel"She said.  
  
He sat up and looked at her.  
  
"Hey!"He plastered on a fake smile.  
  
"Umm,we need to talk"She said.  
  
'here it comes' he thought.  
  
"Joel......I'm....."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I'm.....this is so hard"She said,looking down.  
  
"I know"Joel said.  
  
"Know what? How hard it is?"  
  
"That you're pregnant.....Benji let it slip"  
  
"He has a big mouth"Laura laughed.  
  
There was a long silence.Finally Joel spoke.  
  
"I'm scared"He whispered.  
  
"Me to"Laura said,beginning to cry.  
  
Joel put his arms around her and kissed her forhead.  
  
"I don't know what to do"Laura cried into his shoulder.  
  
"Me either"Joel said,beginning to cry himself.  
  
Finally they both stopped and Joel was still in shock.  
  
"Laura.....I'm not gonna be like my dad....but gimme a little time......just a little while.....and this will all be okay...I promise"Joel said. 


	6. just a short chapter

That night all the girls slept in one room,mainly becuase Laura wasn't going to sleep in the same room as Joel. When she thought everyone was alseep,Talon's eyes opened.She could hear Laura crying softly.What Joel had said had realy hurt her. He wouldn't accept the fact that he was going to be a father. She wished he could be more like Benji. The next morning the guys were gone before the girls got up.They had rehearsal for the show.The only difference was Paul,Billy and Benji actually kissed the girls goodbye before they left. No one told Laura that though.She was asleep when they did.They didn't want to hurt her anymore that she already was.  
  
"Joel,you can't avoid her forever!"Billy said.  
  
"I'm not avoiding her"Joel responded.  
  
"Baby Joel's gonna come in 8 months,you're gonna have to be there" Paul said.  
  
"It's not gonna be named Joel if it is a boy,and I will be there"Joel sighed.  
  
"What do you want,a boy or a girl?"Billy asked.  
  
"Dosn't matter,maybe both"Joel shrugged.  
  
"You want it to be Michael Jackson?"Benji asked.  
  
"Twins you dumbass!"Joel rolled his eyes.  
  
"Why would you want twin?They'd probably turn out just like us"Benji laughed.  
  
"No,they'd actually have a father"Joel responded.  
  
"That's true"Billy nodded.  
  
"Don't worry,no matter what it is.....I'll be there"Joel said.  
  
"Don't tell us that,tell Laura"Paul stated the obviouse.  
  
"Not yet"Joel shook his head.  
  
The girls sat in the hotel room watching My Big Fat Greek Wedding.  
  
"Just like our family"Amanda laughed.  
  
"Not exactly"Talon said"We're not realated to Joey Fatone"  
  
Everyone laughed.  
  
"I wish"Amanda smiled.  
  
When it was over,they watched Lilo And Stitch.  
  
"My favorite"Laura and Nikole said at the same time.  
  
They laughed.  
  
"Everything for the 2 pregnant girls!" 


	7. The Worst Heart Break

It was quiet in the room.Benji was asleep next to Nikole.There was small pain in her stomach.  
  
"Oww"She whispered to herself.  
  
Benji slowly began to wake up.  
  
"Baby,what's wrong?"He asked.  
  
"Benji,it hurts right here" She said,pointing to a spot on her right side.  
  
"Labor?"  
  
"No,I'm only 7 months"Nikole shook her head.  
  
"Maybe we should call the doctor"Benji said,getting up.  
  
By 8:30 they were checked into the hospital.  
  
"Somthings wrong with her"Nikole whispered.  
  
"Her?"  
  
Nikole noded.  
  
"A girl! that's great! We're gonna name her nevaeH right?" Benji asked.  
  
"Yeah,we're gonna name her nevaeH"Nikole smiled,weakly.  
  
"What's wrong?"Benji asked.  
  
"Something's wrong"Nikole said again.  
  
"No,nothings wrong,its just premature,that's all"Benji smiled.  
  
Nikole sighed,she knew she wasn't getting through to him.The doctor walked in and looked at her.  
  
"Okay,Nikole,you have you're epidural,now in a few minutes we're going to start pushing.Then by......10-11ish,we'll have a baby"He said.  
  
Nikole was asleep a little while later.Benji sat running his fingers through her hairs.He kissed her forhead.She was right. Something was wrong......the baby was gone.She slowly woke up.Benji pressed his lips together and looked at her.  
  
"What's wrong?"She asked.  
  
"You were right,something was wrong"He whispered.  
  
"What?"  
  
"The baby's......."  
  
Nikole's eyes filled with tears.For the first time in a long time Benji was crying. Joel and Amanda were out in the waiting room,they knew something was wrong too.  
  
"Do you think everythings okay?"Amanda asked.  
  
Joel shook his head.Finally Benji came out and told them.  
  
"It's not her fault though"Benji said "The doctor said she was doing everything she could"  
  
"That's so sad"Laura said,feeling her stomach.  
  
At that moment Joel felt a connection with the baby in Laura's stomach. He accepted it. It took his brother losing his baby to realize hoe much the baby needed him.  
  
"Laura" He said.  
  
She looked up at him.  
  
"Yeah"  
  
"I love you,and I want to be there for the baby"Joel said.  
  
Laura smiled and kissed Joel.Benji turned and walked back into Nikole's room. She was ready to leave. Benji put his arm around her.  
  
"Joel's gonna be around for the baby"He whispered.  
  
"That's good"Nikole said.  
  
"Let's just go home"Benji noded.  
  
Nikole agreed.They got in the car and slowly drove back to Benji's.Nikole's hand was on her tummy the whole time.  
  
* "If I Could Be Like" by 3 Doors Down plays softly*  
  
Moms playing with their children were everywhere she looked.She didn't have that.Laura would,but she wouldn't.They pulled into the garage and got out.Nikole walked back to the bedroom,she stoped and looked into the room that was the nursery. Covered with pink and blue baby things. Clothes,pillows,toys,everything.Finally she just broke down in tears.Benji put his arms around her. 


	8. Bet It's A Boy

Nikole finally feel asleep in the bedroom. She needed it. Benji sat on the couch staring at a blank tv screen.He really wanted that baby. He wanted to take care of it,and be around to what her grow up. He sighed as there was a knock on the door. He got up and walked over and opened it.Paul stood there.  
  
"Hey,man,I'm sorry"He said.  
  
"It's okay"Benji shrugged.  
  
"You really wanted it huh"  
  
Benji noded.  
  
"Joel sent me to check on you....since he's with Laura at that class with a weird name"Paul laughed.  
  
"Llamas or some animal like that"Benji laughed a little.  
  
"Yeah"Paul noded.  
  
Benji stared down at the floor.Paul knew what was coming.He put his arms around Benji,and Benji cried into his shirt.  
  
"You really wanted her"Paul said.  
  
Benji was crying so hard,he couldn't answer.  
  
The next morning Benji walked into his living room and Joel was sitting on the couch.  
  
"You do realize....this is my house.....you have your own tv at your house"He said.  
  
"But Laura there,and she's not in a good mood"Joel laughed.  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"I think she can still have PMS even though she's pregnant"Joel shrugged.  
  
"I don't think so"Benji shook his head.  
  
"Oh,then shes just not happy"Joel responded.  
  
"Must be your son"Benji shrugged.  
  
"I never said I was having a boy"Joel said.  
  
"Trust me,you are,if I was gonna have a girl,then you're have a boy"Benji noded.  
  
"I bet you I'm not"  
  
"Bet you are "Benji laughed.  
  
"20"  
  
"50"Benji smiled.  
  
"Your on!"  
  
"In the delivery room,when you have a boy,you're paying up"Benji laughed.  
  
"No,you're paying up!"Joel laughed.  
  
"Have you thought of names?"  
  
"For a girl!"Joel said.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Britney"  
  
"And a boy?"  
  
"Ryan"  
  
"See,you think you might have a boy"Benji said.  
  
"Shut up!"Joel laughed.  
  
"You're just mad cuz you know your big brothers right!"Benji smiled.  
  
"You're not my big brother"Joel laughed again.  
  
Benji tackled him,and they started wrestling in the floor.Nikole walked in and saw them.  
  
"I'm gonna go back to bed"She said. 


End file.
